I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize