All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
