i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
the liver wants what the liver wants
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Randomize
