Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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