I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Randomize
