went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I supernannyed him into submission
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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