Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
