I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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