im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
