ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
