More tranny stories later!
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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