New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
