yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
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