All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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