And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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