just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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