Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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