did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
