forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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