i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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