With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
