so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
