if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
