he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
