You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
so explain again why im purple
no
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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