new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
