Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
