69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
