i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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