I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
