She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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