so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My dick has a subreddit
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
