I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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