I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
