I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He? As in you personified your dick?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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