i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
