what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
The adults are the big ones right?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
