it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize