I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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