we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
