This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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