girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
