So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
