What a fucking waste of an outfit
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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