I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize