and you said cock pushups were impossible
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
