no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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