i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
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