Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
