well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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