On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize