I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
